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Need to get sex Organ New Mexico Just not what you think you want to fix you can fix your mistakes. You can feel the pain that blowing off your relationship caused, you can own up to it and accept the consequences of it. You can accept that you can't undo THOSE mistakes but you can take stock of the valid issues key word there, VALID issues that contributed to the situation you are in. You might not have the right perspective at this moment to do that, right now you're too fucked up because you want to 'fix it' all and get what you thought your life was about back. That ain't gonna happen, even if she walked through the door today and asked for a shot that life is gone, it's in the past and no matter what comes in the future your life be different. YOU have a say in how that is shaped. Take time to really think about the person you would promise her to be right now why are you promising that? Are they things you know you should do better with? There are probably a few things in there that are valid problems you have and a few that at this moment you would tell her you accept as your issue just to get her back. Separate the valid from the rest and imagine the person you want to be for YOU. You're probably a fucking trainwreck right now, maybe not ready to start being someone who's rebuilding and your thoughts are stuck in the obsession phase. You might as well use some of that energy to own the shit you need to fix 'I did X, Y Z', it landed me in this mess, I didn't do anything about it when I had the opportunity for this relationship those I don't want to repeat. A lot of times a broken heart is an open heart, an honest heart a selfish one. You're too weak to hide all that shit you know you have How can you be less of the shit you really hate right now and more of the stuff you really like? I bet you that person. So use this painful time to say that is the person I should have been and change it to be that is the person I work to be. The catch, no strings attached, no reward, no girlfriend coming back to what a wonderful guy you've become. Just do it anyway. You have a to learn take it.